A Journey for One

We were both on a train; off to somewhere unknown and a faraway destination.

We were alone and yet the sound of our boisterous laughter filled the entire train. We were having so much fun. We were enjoying each other’s company.

We talked tirelessly; we discussed everything we could think about.

We were holding hands, hugging and kissing. It was evident that love was in the air. It could be felt and smelled.

We were oblivious of our surroundings; without a single care outside our space.

And then suddenly, the mood shifted to something forlorn. A grim silence followed. I put my head on your shoulder. I felt the tension running through your veins.

I’ll be gone for a while… my stop is coming too soon. I’ll step out on the next station, you whispered.

I held your hand more tightly and replied,

No, I will never let go of your hand, Papa.

This is just a temporary separation. I’ll wait for you at your designated station. I’ll pick you up by then. Do not worry, Mahal ko.

You put your hand on the left side of my chest and said,

I may not be with you physically, but I’ll always be in your heart. I want you to promise me that you will continue your journey. And you will always be happy.

You were still saying something when the train passed by an uproarious place. I could only see your mouth moving but no sound can be heard. I also tried to read the words from your lips but I couldn’t.

We then subsequently entered a tunnel. It was dark and inauspicious. The train was swallowed whole by the creepy blackness of the passage. We both fell into silence.

After a few nerve- wrecking minutes, the train was once again embraced by sunlight. I smiled and turned my head towards your direction. But to my surprise, you were no longer seating beside me.

You were already standing at the platform, waving goodbye. You were smiling yet tears were falling from your unhappy eyes.

I tried to run after you, but my feet were glued on the floor. We were only two meters away from each other and yet I couldn’t move to reach you.

Aside from that, the train’s door immediately closed. And it started moving forward; leaving you behind.

Everything happened so fast. I failed miserably to catch on. I was too shocked.

I didn’t know for how long, but I was just standing and staring at the closed door in front of me.

And when the truth finally hit me, I found myself inside a small and dimly lit cabin. I was sitting in one corner, silently crying and hugging myself.

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I was calling you, begging for you to come back. But you couldn’t hear me anymore.

I was left alone…

Alone to go on and continue the journey. 

Cold sweat broke on my forehead; my limbs numbed and veins throbbed. My head was about to explode. My breathing became difficult. I was trying to catch it, trying to fill my lungs with air. It was painful. I tried to move. And with one big attempt, I was able to shift position. And opened my aching eyes…  

I then realized that it was only a dream.

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